Not Looking For Love In All The Wrong Places

A recent posting on a friends timeline made me think of why I’m single.

I haven’t been looking for love on a dating website or in social gatherings. The one woman I was interested in didn’t seem to share that feeling.

Does it take both parties to be looking? Is she out there looking for me? Why hasn’t she found me yet? (see above)

Is it possible I met my soul mate and ruined the chance? Wouldn’t a soul mate accept me as I am and vice versa?

Will I keep asking questions?

I’m honestly jaded after my last two relationships because one woman was mean and the other would say one thing then do another. I did go on a date after breaking up with the second girlfriend but because of her actions I was  (over?) observant and critical.

I met this woman on Match.com and after several email exchanges, we went to a coffee shop. The conversation felt forced at times but I wasn’t going to let that be a final reason. It was when she wanted to go to lunch that I was cautious because I wasn’t going to pay for both us and didn’t know how to express that, eventually we agreed to go dutch.

Afterwards we were walking around Pleasantville and heard the music festival, again she wanted to go but tickets were pricey. I was more hesitant this time because I was beginning to feel that she was trying to take advantage of me. We bought our own tickets which resolved that. The festival was enjoyable but our conversations still didn’t have a natural flow to them. Maybe we were nervous, maybe we didn’t click.

It was when we decided to go to dinner and movie later that week when I knew that she wasn’t right for me. During dinner she wasn’t observant of the fact I had gotten my hair cut. We went to see ‘Beasts of The Southern Wild’ and afterwards we discussed it a bit. I won’t spoil the movie for you but my date seemed to want to argue about a fact in the movie. Even when I countered with all the examples given that were strong proof, she disagreed. This is when I thought to myself ‘Are you arguing just to argue?’ and felt that if I continued to date this woman it would have been more of this evening. When we got to her car I explained that I wasn’t interested and wished her the best.

I know that that shouldn’t be the reason for me to remain single but considering what I’ve dealt with over the years doesn’t make me want to try anytime soon.